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It’s February which means love is all around us. Whether you’re going out to a posh a restaurant with your partner this Valentine’s Day, or celebrating Galentine’s Day and female friendships with a girls night in, don’t forget to love yourself first.

We asked Psychotherapist, Clinical Hypnotherapist and Mindset Coach Ella McCrystal how we as women can learn to love ourselves more and regain self-love this Valentine’s Day and EVERY day.

“When we think about self-love, we sometimes miss the smaller, more consistent things we can do for ourselves,” says Ella. “When I’m working with my clients, I remind them that self-love is not just showing up for yourself occasionally. It is a choice that you make every day to respect yourself… and be patient with yourself. It is demonstrating to yourself that YOU are worthy, beautiful, and deserving of time and love.”

How to love yourself and nurture self-love

Five ways that you can show up for YOU, nurture a deep appreciation for who you are and fall in love with yourself again…


Create the ultimate self-care bath routine

Why not use to your most luxurious shower oils or gels…and then indulge in a long, hot shower every once in a while. To be even more self-caring, enjoy a lovely exfoliating scrub and follow by taking the time to moisturise your skin. Don’t rush – in fact, why not add some beautiful candles? Perhaps even put on some music and sing your heart out in the shower. Pamper yourself for as long as you need. Sometimes, everything else can wait.

Decluttering for self-care

You may wonder how the next tip could be considered self-love. But, tidying your room or your closet, can have an immediate and positive effect on your mood. Clearing out items that you no longer need to make room for new ones, or organising your drawers will have you feeling more accomplished, satisfied and more balanced than you might think.

I remind my clients that when they feel stressed out, one of the first things they can do to feel more centred, is taking care of their personal space. When we do this we remind ourselves that we matter too. To make this easier – try spending 15 minutes once a week working on one area – a drawer, a corner of a room, a pantry etc. A consistent effort is a show of real self-love.

Do something you love

Life can get overwhelming at times and in the midst of it all we can forget to do something we truly enjoy. Whether it is working out and moving your body, doing something creative, or spending time with friends…doing something you love even for a short time can make you feel so much happier. When you don’t have much time on your hands, plan ahead and aim to make some time for you.

Have a self-care movie night in

Have you ever been aimlessly channel-hopping and unexpectedly found yourself hooked on a great movie? Perhaps you’ve become so engrossed that you transported for a while. It felt good right? I often suggest to my burnt out clients that time alone is a great way to show some self-love. A good movie night by yourself can do wonders! Why not make yourself a hot chocolate too. You could also dim your lights and get out your favourite candles. This extra bit of sensory effort can be oh so soothing.

Practising gratitude as a tool for self-care

One of the simplest but most effective ways to demonstrate self love is by staying grateful for what you are blessed with. By practicing gratitude, you allow yourself to be grounded in the positive and you forget to compare and despair. This automatically contributes to making you a happier, more satisfied person.


Five more mini self love tips for women:

Eat healthier

Add an extra piece of fruit or veg a day to your diet.

Move your body

Try watching YouTube Yoga or a HIIT expert that you can follow for 15 mins a day.

Forgive yourself

Give yourself the same grace that you would extend to someone else if they were imperfect.

Make a self-love list

Make a list of your best traits and accomplishments. Although it may be challenging initially, developing this habit can help you learn to accept yourself.

Set Boundaries

If you think about ‘how to love yourself’, then it starts by focusing with yourself. Don’t feel guilty for saying no. Saying no occasionally does not make you a bad person. Steer clear of time-sucking activities that don’t add meaning to your life.


  • Jennifer Read-Dominguez

    Jennifer Read-Dominguez is founder of The Women's Journal and a digital editorial director with over ten years experience in the media and publishing industry. Jennifer has led the digital transformation strategies for many market-leading lifestyle magazines putting SEO and e-commerce at the forefront. She is also founder of Jeneration Public Relations - a UK digital-first public relations and communications consultancy that provides strategic coverage for clients.

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